How to Advocate for Yourself with Customer Service

By Peter Fairchild, Director of Member Relations

This article covers:

When Customer Service Falls Short: The Hurdles to Solving an Issue
Why Being Your Champion Matters
Tips for Assertive Communication with Customer Service

Jordan had been looking forward to her package all week. She finally treated herself to a lipstick set from a trendy new makeup brand that promised elegance. The packaging looked divine, and the purchase was reasonably priced.

When the box arrived, she tore it open with excitement. But her smile quickly faded. Inside were two crushed eyeshadow palettes, a leaking bottle of setting spray, and neon green nail polish. She never ordered any of these items. There was no lipstick. No velvet packaging.

Jordan took a deep breath, snapped photos of the products, and opened her laptop. She typed a message to the company’s customer service department, included the pictures, and requested a refund or a replacement.

To her surprise, she received a response within the hour. The customer service representative apologized and assured her the lipstick set would be shipped immediately, along with a complimentary gift for the inconvenience.

When Customer Service Falls Short

Sometimes our interactions with customer service go smoothly, but not every experience ends as easily as Jordan’s. So how can we increase the likelihood of having positive experiences with customer service representatives?

Some people find themselves stuck in a maze of frustration when trying to resolve an issue. It often begins with long wait times and being stuck on hold or waiting days for a reply. Then come the robotic responses that don’t address the concern, generic apologies, and policies copied and pasted into emails.

Even reaching a real person can feel like a battle. Automated systems and chatbots loop endlessly, and once you do get through, you might have to repeat your story multiple times to different agents. Promises to “look into it” sometimes vanish into silence, and vague updates might leave you wondering if anyone is working on your case.

Some companies offer limited resolution options, like partial refunds or store credit, even when the mistake was entirely theirs. Language barriers or cultural differences can also complicate things, especially when dealing with international brands. And perhaps most frustrating of all is the feeling of being dismissed or disrespected when the tone of the representative feels cold, indifferent, or even condescending.

Experiences like these demonstrate that learning to advocate for yourself effectively is vital. It’s not just about getting a refund, it’s about being heard, respected, and treated fairly.

Why Speaking Up for Yourself Matters

Seeking resolution from customer service is about protecting your rights, encouraging better business practices, and saving time. Clear, respectful communication from you helps companies understand the issue and respond faster. It also builds your confidence as a consumer and can lead to positive outcomes, like refunds, replacements, or even unexpected rewards. Plus, your feedback may help improve the experience for future customers.

Tips for Advocating for Yourself Efficiently

Be Respectful and to the Point. State what happened, when it happened and why it’s a problem as briefly as possible. Express disappointment calmly and avoid using emotional or accusatory language. Provide key information such as dates, transaction/order numbers, your full name, and contact details. Know what you want: a refund, replacement, or apology. Be reasonable in your expectations and request for resolution.
Keep all communications professional. Remember this is about resolving an issue and not a venting session. Maintain a business-like tone.
Use the Right Channels. If the company has a dedicated complaint line, use it. The complaint line is often found on the customer service portal or in-app support. Many companies regularly provide customers with the opportunity to take voice or online surveys about their service experience. If this vehicle is available, it can also be useful.
Document all Communications. Keep all invoices, receipts, warranties and other documents for purchases and services. Check the return, warranty and guarantee before reaching out. Once the complaint has been filed, keep copies of all messages. If you dealt with a chatbot or live chat and can’t save the chat, take screenshots. If you spoke with a customer service representative over the phone, write down the date and time of the call, the name of the person you spoke with and what was discussed. You can also record the call if permitted.

Timing Matters. Don’t wait too long to reach out; the sooner you act, the more seriously you will be taken. When the dispute involves a credit card, you should give the business a chance to fix the issue. However, if you are ignored or unhappy with the results, you have a certain amount of time to request reversal of any credit card payment you made. Most credit card companies give you 60 days, and a few as much as 120 days to file a complaint that may result in a chargeback. Note: Before reversing the payment, the card issuer will investigate the issue.
Follow-Up. Don’t forget to check back if you don’t hear from the company. Create reminders for yourself to do so. Keep records of all communication. Be patient but persistent. If it turns out the mistake is on your end, be gracious and move on.
Call in Reinforcements. If the first contact isn’t helpful, ask for a supervisor. You can escalate the complaint up the management ladder. If this escalation doesn’t work, you may want to voice your concerns calmly and professionally on social media, since this may nudge the company to respond. You can also leave a review of the product or your experience with the company.
Seek Outside Help. As a last resort, contact advocacy groups, government agencies, or your local consumer protection office. Some may charge a small fee.

A Resolution and a Reminder

Three days later, Jordan received a pristine box with her lipstick set, a handwritten note from the customer service representative, and a bonus silk makeup pouch.

Customer service issues can be frustrating, but they don’t have to be defeating. Whether you're dealing with a missing purchase or a more serious service failure, remember: your voice counts. By approaching concerns with clarity, professionalism, and persistence, you increase your chances of a positive resolution and help shape better experiences for others.